love yo' self

hey lovelies,

You know what absolutely sucks? Feeling like you suck. 

*Disclaimer, you don't*

This week has been such a roller-coaster for me. One day I feel like I'm on top of the world, that the endless supply of love that there is in the universe is held right in my heart. The next day, or even sometimes an hour after I feel all that love, I'll feel so empty, like I'll never feel love again. It makes zero sense. And that's because feeling bad about yourself doesn't. It's bullshit. We just shouldn't do it. But we all know if it was that easy, anxiety wouldn't be a thing.

If you struggle with this, my advice to you (and myself) is this: Do the things you love. 

I know that sounds kind of basic and cliche, but it works wonders. Today, I was texting one of my good friends about my not so good day. I told them I would get out of my anxiety even though today it was killer (speak it into existence, amiright). They liked my optimism, and asked me how I usually get out of these moods, and what helps me feel better. Instead of saying my usual yoga, meditation, positive self talk script that I give to myself and others all the time, I actually thought about it. Not that yoga and meditation and being nice to yourself aren't good for you, they're great, but they usually work for me when I'm not already in a funk. What does get me out of my funk is dancing, singing, blasting my jams, and painting. Like all at once. I've never been upset when I was creating something, it's a surefire way for me to get out of my head and live in the moment. So far, anyways. 

If there's something you love doing, that brings your vibe up whenever you do it, go out there and do it! Unless it's hard drugs or something, don't do that. That's not the kind of high we're striving for here. If you love bike riding, god damn it grab that bike! Or cooking, writing, doing nice things for the people you love. Whatever it is that makes your soul happy, go after it. Especially if you have a bunch of responsibilities to take care of. I find that I can't focus on anything if my mind won't stop hurling insults at me. Taking a break can, and probably will, make you more productive.

Anyways, I hope you all have a beautiful day! Feel good about yourself, you are literally made out of stardust. And, as a reminder, taking care of yourself is not selfish, but self-less. We are our best selves to others when we are to ourselves. 

peace and happiness,

ashley 

Say No To Drugs, Not Naps (I actually don't mind the drugs so much, just get enough rest plz)

Hey guys!

This week I thought it would be a good reminder for everyone to talk about how important it is to be well rested. With midterms coming up, there has been more and more homework and studying to do that has been piling up (at least it has been for me), and that leads to staying up late getting work done, or waking up early, scrambling before class to do it. Sometimes both.

This is why it's so very important to get the at least the minimum amount of sleep you need to feel well rested. This post is probably gonna sound like a rant from that one grandma in your family whose hobby is nagging others lol, but I feel like many times we get so caught up hanging out with people or over-working ourselves that we forget to do the basic things we need to do to take care of ourselves.

Personally, I need like 10 hours of sleep to be able to function, and this can be extremely hard to get overnight. This is why lately I've been taking so many naps, and it's been so good for my well-being and productivity.

Lately, when I have been napping, I've been missing out on hanging out with friends. Which is something I generally feel bad about, but I have to remind myself that it's not selfish to sleep if you can't function. So if you ever feel too tired to go out, don't feel bad for staying in! You should literally do nothing, nap, and give yourself a break! It's much needed sometimes, and if you have good friends, they'll definitely understand. (:

Have a wonderful week lovelies!

Food for thought? Remember to eat!

Hello lovelies! 

This week I wanted to write about something I've been struggling with over the past few weeks, an issue I feel many college students experience. It can be really hard to remember to take care of ourselves throughout our busy days, with classes, homework and studying, there seems like there is hardly any free time we can have for ourselves. While juggling everything, I often times forget to eat. I'll go throughout an entire day only have eaten an apple and a granola bar. And at the end of the day when I get to my dorm, I won't have any food waiting for me! The Dining commons closes early, and the freshman meal plan I am on doesn't really give me money to eat anywhere else on campus.

Summary: It can be extremely hard to eat when you're busy all day and when places to eat on campus close early. So, many times, we just don't. Which is extremely unhealthy.

This is especially bad for students who are already struggling with eating disorders. It gives these students a reason to not eat, makes their fight against their disorder more difficult, and is an uphill battle. 

I have come up with a few solutions to this issue, and if this is something you struggle with, I hope this list is helpful for you!

1. Get a refrigerator and a microwave : This seems pretty obvious, but I thought I'd put it out there anyways. Having a fridge allows you to take home any leftovers you have, and the microwave allows you to have them nice and warm! (I know it's extremely obvious buuuut I feel like someone out there may need to hear this lol)
2. After eating at the Dining Commons, if your school has to-go meals, grab one to take to your dorm! : This is advice that my uncle recently gave me, and it's brilliant. Just take the to-go meal and put it in your fridge! It reduces the amount of time you have to take to walk to get a meal, the effort of walking more than you have to, and you have food waiting for you when you get back to your dorm.
3. Sign up for amazon's grocery subscription : Have food delivered to your college on a monthly basis, and save money! This saves the time and energy of going to a grocery store (plus, if you don't have a car, it can be hard to get to one) Plus, when you sign up for a monthly subscription of your fav snacks, you save 15%
4. Sign up for any kind of food rewards program you can : I know many pizza places have rewards accounts where you can get free pizzas, grocery stores have point rewards system, and target does 5% cash back when you use your red card (You can even connect it to your bank account and use it as debit, it doesn't have to be credit)

I hope this post was helpful for you! Always remember to be good to yourself, self-care is not selfish, and of course, to eat! Have a beautiful rest of your week, peace! (:

Sacred Spaces

Hello lovelies!

I hope you all are having an amazing week! This post I wanted to focus on how important it is to have your very own sacred space. What I mean by sacred space is an area that you feel safe enough in to completely be yourself, where you can unwind and feel totally free to be you.

Transitioning into college life is so stressful because most of us are accustomed to having our own "sacred spaces" growing up. Most often, it's usually our bedroom, but can be any area of our home where we feel comfortable enough to just be. If you live on campus, unless you are living in a single, the privacy and comfort of having your own space is suddenly ripped away from you. You are alone, yet surrounded by people, trying to feel comfortable in a new place without the support of any kind of familiarity.

There are so many different little things you can do to make your area of your dorm feel more comfortable to you, to make you feel as much at home that you can in a foreign environment. Putting things up in your dorm that make you happy is so important, especially since most of us have to share our room, your room might not feel like you belong there, like it's not your space. Making the most out of the small space that IS yours in your dorm is so insanely important to feeling comfortable in your own skin, expressing yourself in your dorm helps give you the confidence to be comfortable being yourself to the rest of the world. Putting up pictures also helps if you feel disconnected from the world around you, giving you reminders of the people you love, helping to ground you when you feel lost and alone. Any little thing you can do to your room is important to making the space in your room your own, filling a bookshelf with your favorite books, putting up artwork from your favorite photographer, if you are part of a fandom bringing that into the decor of your room, literally anything that you can think of that brings you a sense of comfort, put up.

I hope some of my ideas sparked up some inspiration to make your dorms feel more like your own space! Have a wonderful rest of your week, peace (:

You gotta do the Yoga

Hey guys (:

So this week I'd like to talk about one of my absolute favoriteee things to do when I'm stressed out: yoga! Yoga allows people to focus on the present moment and reduces the amount of time the mind wanders (most anxiety and stress stems from worrying about future events). It definitely helps me with mine, and I hope my list helps you with yours!

1. Child's Pose - child's pose is a resting pose, it is easy for beginners and I usually start and/or end a yoga sequence with this pose. To do this pose, kneel on the floor with your feet together and sit on your heels. Then exhale and lay down, putting your torso between your knees. Stretch out your hands to the top of the yoga mat, staying in that pose for at least 30 seconds. I like to stretch out both sides of my back by reaching my hands to the left and then reaching them to the right.
   
2. Downward Facing dog - this pose is pretty easy as well, and releases so much stress! For downward facing dog, start standing with your hands reaching up to the sky. Then, bend over and place your hands on the ground. Hold this pose for at least one minute. If this stretch is too hard at first, try alternating what leg you are actively standing on. To do this, bend one leg forward while standing on the other leg, and switch until you feel comfortable. 
   
3. Standing Forward Fold (Uttanasana) - standing forward fold is great for quieting a restless mind. To do this pose, bend your knees and lean forward, putting your hands in front of or alongside your feet. Shift your weight to the balls of your feet, tighten your legs by straightening them. Grab each elbow and hold this position for a few breaths (or longer, whatever works for you!)
   

These are some of my favorite poses to reduce stress, and there are so many more out there! I recommend checking out the YouTube channel Boho Beautiful for yoga sequences you can do from your dorm room! Their videos are high quality, and they have yoga sequences put together for beginners so if you're thinking about getting into yoga they're super helpful! Oh, and not to mention it's completely free!

I hope you all have a beautiful week, peace (:

domiNOs

Hello lovelies!

Sooooo earlier last week my roommate and I wanted pizza one night, and we started a phone order, but the man over the phone was confused, so we ordered online instead.  

Fast forward, we picked up our order and then started walking over to hang out with some of her friends across campus.. Then my roommate and I both start getting phone calls from Dominos, a very angry worker starts barking at us to come pay for our pizza, even though we already did?

We soon figured out that the man over the phone put our order through even though we never completed the order. I explained the situation to the man calmly, but he was extremely rude and ended up hanging up on me in the middle of me speaking. He called me again a few minutes later and told me aggressively that I had to come meet him and pay for the extra order, (and don’t judge me for this I swear I usually don’t act like one of those angry soccer moms) I raised my voice and went on a long rant about how people should treat others and how he wasn’t being a very nice or kind person. And, what a surprise, he hung up on me again.

I was pretty wound up after that happened, we walked a good ways across campus when we first got the phone calls, and started walking back to our dorm when we thought we hadn’t paid for our order (even though we had.) I was a mess and was extremely stressed out.

So, how did I deal with all of this pent up stress?

The first thing I did was sit down. I took a small breather (deep breathing is extremely helpful with reducing the amount of stress and anxiety you feel, I’ll do an entire blog post about that later.)

Then, I called my boyfriend and explained everything that happened to me that night. Talking to people you love, trust, and know will be supporting and understanding of you is very helpful in reducing stress. Having someone there to listen to your problems makes them easier to take on.

After I was done talking on the phone, I decided to relax in my room instead of going out with my roommate. I was still so wound up from everything that happened. Going out would not have wound me up even more when I really just needed time to myself to decompress and relax. I started to feel bad because I didn’t go through with my plans (which is really not a healthy way to think.) I had to remind myself that going out while I was stressed out wouldn’t be fun for the people I was going to hang out with or for myself, so staying in was actually not selfish at all.

When I got to my room I snuggled up under some blankets and journaled about how I felt about the disaster that was my Wednesday night. Journaling in general, but especially after a traumatic or stressful event lets you get your feelings out in an organized way so they’re not stuck in your head making circles around themselves. Or if the thoughts do stick around after are usually not as jumbled and not as constant, so you are still left with some peace of mind.

After journaling, I put on a video from my favorite youtuber, reminding me to stay positive. It's always good to watch any kind of feel good shizz nit AFTER acknowledging the negative emotions stress can bring on, so that you don't repress those feelings just for them to come back later. I left the video near the bottom of the page if anyone needs some encouragement to be positive! Ralph Smart has some great videos about positivity and self help, I definitely recommend checking his channel out (:

Oh, and I almost forgot...I ate the shit outta that pizza!!!!  (although I wouldn’t always recommend eating your feelings, the freshman fifteen is real man)

Before I leave you, always remember self care is selfless and to do it whenever you feel it’s necessary.

Have an amazing week!